This short hair is the PITS!
I had to learn how to style it.
I’m style challenged. Unless it involved long curls and humongous bangs I am shitouttaluck.
I had to get wax and root lifter and HAIRSPRAY and for the love of God there is so much more than White Rain these days.
(I’m actually NOT that bad)
I also had to buy a new hairdryer. I NEVER EVER blow dry my hair (until now because short hair looks REALLY funny in the morning if you go to bed with it wet) I discovered that my old hairdryer (that I’ve had since I was married the first time) had a problem blowing out HOT air (which is not a problem I have really) so I’ll save it for Quagmires’s baths but now I have a nice new shiny one and I luff it.
(and I luff this hair too)

I’m still a little sore from the gym on Friday but I do have an appointment with the gym nazi (Gary) tomorrow so the pain will be back full force. I know I asked for this but he’s MEAN!

(I am totally obsessed with cereal right now)

If you guys wanna see cute go check out Melanie’s crafts and stuff. I’m SO hitting the craft store so I can do stuff like this.

/boring post

I’m so frustrated now I could kill people. I told my doctor that but the I said I was kidding and laughed.. even though I’m not kidding. I could probably kill someone right now.

I have no idea what is wrong. He said he’d like to up my Lamictal which is what stabilizes my moods. I probably need it however IT MAKES MY FACE BREAK OUT and right NOW I look like a 15 year old boy. What the hell is going to happen in 2 weeks when the new dose kicks in.
I would rather have WRINKLES then the crap I have now so I’m frustrated about that.

And another thing, I don’t have an answering machine that you can walk in the house click a button and listen to the messages while I do things like pee and take the dog out to pee. I have to call a number, punch in a code, listen to messages and delete them. I DON’T DO THAT. I MIGHT check them once a month to delete them.
Most of my friends know I don’t check them. MY MOM knows I don’t check them.
I was talking to someone today and she said “OMG I LEFT YOU THREE MESSAGES AND YOU NEVER CALLED BACK”..

O RLY? WELL I DON’T CHECK THEM. IF IT IS IMPORTANT EMAIL ME .. and by email I mean EMAIL NOT MYSPACE because MYSPACE IS NOT EMAIL and I don’t check that but maybe once a month.  So I’m frustrated about that.
Even my non-technical friends know to email me.

I’m still frustrated about piece of crap laptop.

I’m frustrated about my stupid cats who have been meowing for 3 hours to eat even though they don’t get fed for another 15 minutes.

I’m frustrated because Godaddy is a big pile of doodoo and they micromanage everything making it impossible to take control of your own domain. Luckily for me they’re in Tempe so since they have pissed me off I’m going to leave Quagmire poop on their doorstep.

I hate Walgreens.
I hate driving in Sun City where the average age of a person there is 134. They can’t see, hear or walk without a walker but oh yeah.. give them a car the size of a small boat to drive. BRILLIANT!

I’m annoyed with my bank who wouldn’t let me CHANGE the date on the check I was trying to deposit from 9-27 to 8-27. She told me I had to get another check.
So I changed the date, initialed it and took it to another branch down the street. Didn’t have a problem depositing it there.

I’m annoyed with my HOA. They charge about $40 a month. They don’t answer their phones, or emails and they sure as hell aren’t in my neighborhood making sure the illegals haven’t taken over with their yard full of cars and weeds taller than me.

I’m sure there is more to bitch about today but really, isn’t that enough?

BUT IT IS JANE’S BIRTHDAY TODAY. SHE’S THE BIG TWO SEVEN. GO WISH HER A HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

My laptop is out of commission until the part comes in (and Gary fixes it).
It WORKS it’s just hooked up to a desktop monitor instead of it’s own and to use it is extremely awkward and a pain in my ass (well neck if we’re being specific).
THUS, unless it’s something I HAVE to do on the computer it’s not being done because I hate the pc and I am not turning around backwards to use the laptop.

The short one word emails are not because I hate you but because I really don’t want to kill myself to email anyone.

That is all (until the laptop is fixed)

- I’m trying to grow my hair out but it’s at the point I want to cut it off.
- something really kickass happened today but I don’t want to say what because of the two self-absorbed, pontificating, idiotic stalkers I have so maybe I’ll make it private. Jane knows though. It’s fantastic.

That is all.
See you in a month (maybe)

I’m here.
I’m not dead.
I’m just not really having anything interesting to say seeings how I’m at home with achy back and legs and head.
The only action around is crazy cats and a dingbat dog.

I have one story (Well no, two but the Walgreen’s one has to wait).

I was out of the house by 8 am today.
I stopped and got a huge Jamba Juice.
I went to the car wash and apparently if you’re there at the butt crack of dawn you get $3 off. Yay

THEN I went to the commissary.
....
You can either go in the morning and get run over by old people or you can go in the afternoon and get run over by military wives and their 42 bratty children.

I chose the morning today.
It took forever just to get IN the commissary because there was a clog at the entrance which turned out to be 2 old people w a l k i n g v e r y s l o w l y.
I zoomed around them as soon as I could and grabbed everything I needed off of the shelves as fast as I could carefully avoiding canes and those little wheely things they ride everywhere (that have no horns, or brake lights, or turn signals and hurt really bad when they run you over and then they pretend they can’t see or hear anything).

SO then I get in line. I decided to use the U-Scan self checkout system at the commissary. I never use it here. It’s really not a convenience at the commissary where they like to micromanage everything.
Well the lady running the U-scans this morning was old. Not old like.. 40’s 50’s 60’s but like Formaldehyde old.
I went over to show her my I.D. to save her the hobble and started checking out my groceries.
She comes over about 3 minutes later and asks to see my I.D.
I tell her.. “Um.. I just showed it to you but here it is (again)”.
Right then I get to the last 2 items in my cart. Celery and Broccoli crowns.
I tapped the “Key in Code” button so that I could key in 4070 for Celery. (I still remember most of them from working at grocery stores). As soon as I type it in there she is just nosing her crap in my business telling me that I can’t use that button. She tells me I have to use the button where you scroll through pictures of vegetables until you find what you need. I’m ignoring her and typing in 4070 and quantity “1” and WHAT DO YOU KNOW. IT WORKS!!!  She’s all “oh.. (decrepit voice) I didn’t even know about that button”. I avoided saying “No shit? They didn’t even have grocery stores when you were born but OK”.
Then I use the little picture thing to ring up my broccoli and I’m done.

Wait, no I’m not done. I have two chicken coupons to ring in.
I scan them and it tells me “Item not found go find some idiot to type it in” and so I call out to her and she hollers that she’ll be right there (because she’s busy “helping” some girl ring in a bunch of those Star Bucks drinks - in other words making sure someone isn’t stealing anything).
SO - I’m sitting there waiting for her and behind me in line is a wrinkled up black man who apparently works there and HE butts in and tries to tell me all I have to do is scan the coupons. I tell him that I DID and they didn’t read and so he takes the coupons from me and starts to scan them. I say again “I HAVE ALREADY DONE THAT AND IT DOESN’T WORK BUT IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER GO FOR IT” (yes, I said it just like that). Of course it doesn’t work so he backs up and says “She (old lady) will be right over to help you”.. at which point I say

“I REALLY DO KNOW HOW TO USE THESE THINGS AND I APPRECIATE YOU TRYING TO BUTT YOUR WAY INTO EVERYTHING BUT PLEASE BACK OFF SO I CAN TAKE MY FUCKING GROCERIES AND GO HOME”.  (I was having a moment.. leave me alone k?)

He then stutters out that he wasn’t trying to say I didn’t know how blah blah… old lady keys in coupons.. I snatch bags and leave vowing to never use those lanes at the commissary ever again since I prefer to be treated like an adult and not watched like I’m a terrorist using the U-Scans at the commissary to buy groceries what the HELL......

I tried to zip out of the parking lot and get the hell off of base asap.
There was a “Commanders Call” that was finishing right when I left the commissary.
They hold them at the theater because it has enough room for everyone who has to be there.
The theater is basically in the same parking lot.
I was stuck in the parking lot waiting for hot headed airmen and old people to figure out how to get out.

It was a miserable experience.
I forgot to get the milk which is the only thing I went for.
My car however is very clean.

If you read through this entire manic post and understood me then you need to be checked for head problems.

*kiss kiss*